Should Christian Woman Submit During Dating? Watch This Episode on YouTube


Related Messages

Submission is a choice. It is an act of worship to God who has saved us. It must be lived out appropriately in relationships according to the Word of God. When submission is done in faith and not out of fear, it is fitting and pleasing to the Lord. To learn more about these things, consider listening to the following sermons by Dr. Caldwell:

Wives & Husbands

The Christian Wife - Part 2

Leaving And Cleaving

Parents And Children

The Christian Wife - Part 1

Marriage And The Gospel

Foundations For A Godly Family - Parts 1 & 2

Submitting One To Another

A Gracious Invitation


Should Christian Woman Submit During Dating? Watch this episode on Vimeo

Should Christian Woman Submit During Dating?

This week on the Straight Truth Podcast, Dr. Richard Caldwell and host Dr. Josh Philpot discuss questions from a listener concerned about the biblical action of submission. Questions asked include: Where is the line of submission when a young woman is dating? Would submission look different for a young woman who lives at home compared to an older one who does not? When should the shift of submission transfer from a woman's father/parents to the man she is to marry? These questions presuppose a belief in submission of which the Bible speaks. But do we really understand submission and what it means? What the Bible says about women and submission is a hotly debated topic in our day and age. But much of it lacks proper biblical understanding and application. Dr. Caldwell seeks to guide us in our thinking as he answers these questions. His approach is as a pastor. But he is not only a pastor. He is a husband, a father of sons and a daughter, and a man who loves and submits to the Lord Jesus Christ.

Dr. Caldwell first speaks of a proper understanding of submission in marriage. Marriage is a covenant relationship, a one flesh bond that has two roles, one of head and the other of helper. The husband is described as the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church. Hence, a headship/helper relationship exists in marriage, that is exclusive to marriage. This kind of relationship does not exist for those who are dating, courting, or preparing for marriage. So in the sense of marital submission, no unmarried woman owes submission to a man before being married to that man.

However, there is that which pleases God that belongs to both manhood and womanhood. There are things that honor God in the interactions that take place among men and women. Men ought to be respectful of women in all settings. Women ought to carry and handle themselves in a way that reflects what God loves in a woman. The Bible tells us He loves a meek and quiet spirit. So even in dating and courtship relationships, there should be a sense in which a woman allows the man to take the lead in some ways.

For any unmarried woman seeking to date, already dating, considering, or preparing for marriage, it is important to have a proper understanding of submission. Dr. Caldwell tells us that if you misunderstand submission, it becomes a dictatorial relationship, and you won’t understand how it applies in all your relationships, even those before you move towards marriage. Proper submission is a submission that accords with truth. It is first a matter of attitude before it is a matter of action. It must first involve the heart, or it’s not submission because it’s not sincere, genuine, or real. Biblical submission is done in faith, not in fear. True submission is motivated by our submission to God.

The relationship of an unmarried 17-year-old living at home with her parents will not be the same as the unmarried 30-year-old living out on her own. But no matter her age, whether it’s 17, 30, or somewhere in between, she needs to remember that her father is the head of the family, her mother is his helper, and; that God calls us to obey and submit to our parents. So until a woman marries, she needs to look to her father/parents for guidance, advice, counsel, wisdom, and direction. Remembering what submission is will incline her to the oversight and counsel of others, especially if she has a believing father. Dr. Caldwell says he believes that this is healthy and biblically right. Yet, this doesn’t mean that we must heed every command of a father or parents. There is a limit to our submission to human authority. If a parent or anyone else, for that matter, becomes dictatorial in their counsel, and they ask or order us to disobey the clear commands of God, we do not do that. When our submission or obedience to them would mean violating Scripture, we must obey the Lord Jesus Christ.

Dr. Caldwell says he is not suggesting that a woman should have to live captive to some bizarre controlling relationship. What he envisions as he shares this information are healthy, godly families. But whatever your age as a woman, until you are married, it is good to have a male figure in your life who is giving you counsel, oversight, and direction. But only submitting to counsel that accords with Scripture.

About The Straight Truth Podcast

The Straight Truth Podcast: Christian Opinions in an Increasingly Secular World. Join Dr. Richard Caldwell, Dr. Josh Philpot, and their guests as they discuss news events, current affairs, and cultural issues from a Biblical point of view. Find the truth at

The Straight Truth Podcast is a weekly opinion show hosted by Dr. Richard Caldwell and Dr. Josh Philpot. Straight Truth is available as an audio podcast on iTunes or as a video podcast through YouTube or Vimeo.  The duration of the podcast is approximately 10 minutes. We release new episodes every Thursday.

The topics discussed in the Straight Truth Podcast are current events, matters that challenge traditional Christian values, and questions submitted by audience members. Dr. Caldwell, Dr. Philpot, and their guests seek to answer these questions with Biblical truths and from a Christian conservative point of view. The Holy Bible is the inspired, infallible, and inerrant Word of God; it alone is and will be the basis and authority of
answering any and all questions.

The Straight Truth Podcast is the perfect podcast for those seeking to strengthen their faith, to be informed on how to broach difficult topics with a Christian point of view, to share their faith with unbelieving friends, to challenge the status quo of their own beliefs by viewing them under the lens of the Scriptures, to interpret current news events from a Biblical point of view, and more.

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Season 21 Credits

Produced by
Juan Carlos Claveria

Executive Producers
Joshua Philpot
David Anders

Hosted by
Joshua Philpot

Social Media Descriptions by
Michele Watson

Graphic Design
David Navejas



Special Thanks to
El Centro Network

Music by

Motion Graphics
The Media Stock

Set Decorator
Molly Atchison

Walking In Grace Produces The Straight Truth Podcast - The Best Christian Podcast On The Web

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